Thursday, February 10, 2011

Dana Has Her Beer Goggles On

Oh beer goggles, how I wish I had them all the time. I am not exactly sure what part of my brain alcohol turns off, but when intoxicated, I often find myself in front of a mirror thinking that I as doomed with a boy face as I though …

Yeah, when I look in the mirror while intoxicated I see an “almost” girl, I barely even recognize my own face beyond the fact that I know that it is mine… However, when sobriety returns, so does my better judgment…. Or is it better judgment after all? I mean, I have been on hormones for a little over 6 months straight now, and I am fully aware that other parts of my body are changing, so why not my face?
I guess my fear is that despite my best efforts, all I seem to see is just plane ole boy face. I am not sure if that is because that is what I have, or if that is the distorted view I have of myself after years of avoiding looking in the mirror at all. I really wish I could understand exactly what it was that I feel so uncomfortable with, but the fact of the matter is that, something just doesn’t add up to me...

In other body issues, my hair is in full out rebellion! I think I even saw it throw a Molotov Cocktail at itself the other day…. Between it just being a constant mess, it is also in about 20 different stages of growth with the advancing hair line leading the way… I am at a loss for what to do anymore, I can’t recall a point in my life where it has EVER been this bad… I sort of think that I need to find a different shampoo, I am fairly certain that the new stuff I am using is just not cutting it. This is another part of my life that has never seemed to work out. All I have ever wanted was a hair stylist that understood my hair, and set me up with a do, product, and a routine that I could afford AND pull off on my own…. Lots of luck with that, I am starting to doubt the existence of such a being.

On a completely unrelated note, the re-packing of our belongings destined for DC is going well. Today I spent the vast majority of the day sorting and packing books and records. THAT is some serious work and I am still not done with it, even though my body is definitely done with it.

Finally, (I know this is a short posting, but you’re just going to have to deal with that) I would like to thank everybody who reads and comments on my blog. I know that I am not exactly and interesting person to read about, and it really does mean a lot to me to know that several of you have taken an interest in what it is that I have to say. I promise that in the near future I will work more diligently on getting regular updates on here. I know I have been slacking and I really do have a lot more to talk about, but getting myself to type it out is challenging at best. So, that being said, I’m out of here to procrastinate about something else!

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